Jeremy Clarkson forced to fend off horse from ‘smelling his testicles’
Date: 2024-10-31
Up Next
Jeremy Clarkson is now a race horse owner, but was humbled in a recent video in which the new steed sniffed his private parts as he introduced the dappled grey to the world.
Holding the newbie on a lead rope, explaining that he only spent £60 on the horse, he said: ‘That’s incredible value for money, because a dog is much smaller, and this has a much longer face.’
Off camera, a voice can be heard pointing out: ‘I think £60 only gets you a share of the horse.’
‘What?’ the Who Wants to be a Millionaire host asked. ‘Well okay, you don’t get all of the horse for £60. But it is a race horse, which means that you will be able to…’
As he tried to justify his purchase, the horse began smelling Jeremy’s nether regions.
‘Stop smelling my testies,’ he asked, as the horse continued to have a good sniff.
Continuing, Jeremy said: ‘You will be able to go to places such as Pontefract and Redcar and be a race horse owner.’
Jeremy appears to have started a syndicate, sharing the ownership of the race horse with ‘thousands’ of others who drink Hawkstone beers – his new business venture made out of his Cotswolds brewery.
Sharing the video on a new Instagram page called thehawkstonianhorse, the caption read: ‘He’s smelt @jeremyclarkson1 ‘s testes and now he’s ready to race!
‘The horse owned by Jeremy and thousands of our Hawkstonians goes to the racecourse for the first time this Friday …follow him here.’
Up Next
The account, which only first posted yesterday, has a description which reads: ‘Meet The Hawkstonian, the racehorse owned by Jeremy Clarkson and thousands of loyal Hawkstonians.’
The presenter has inserted himself into the idyllic rural community – which is also the centre of the new Jilly Cooper TV adaptation Rivals – in his quest to become a farmer.
That he’s done through three seasons of Clarkson’s Farm, with a fourth currently in production.
This comes after the Grand Tour tour star revealed he’d undergone a heart procedure after his health suddenly deteriorated.
After suffering from worrying symptoms including being ‘clammy’, with a ‘tightness in my chest’, and ‘pins and needles in my left arm’, he had a stent fitted when doctors discovered that one of his arteries was ‘completely blocked’.
Writing about his ‘extremely urgent surgery’, Jeremy said he wasn’t scared at the time but was now after being told how he ‘must live my life from now on’.
‘Literally, I am not allowed to have fun any more. This is terrifying,’ he said.
‘The worst problem though is diet. To cut my alarmingly high levels of cholesterol, I need to cut out, completely, everything I like eating,’ he explained in his column for The Sun.
‘Bacon, sausages, beef, lamb, pork, butter, chips, proper milk, Cadbury’s fruit and nut bars and the interesting bit in an egg.
‘I’ve had a week now to live in the new regime and it’s horrific. Have you ever tried kale? Well, don’t, because it’s like eating the contents of a AAA battery.’