Schofield show is a pity party which will open wounds… making it shows he rates himself above everyone else

PHILLIP Schofield has made some dreadful decisions in recent years.

And returning to TV in Channel 5’s Cast Away is another one.

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Phillip Schofield is obviously throwing himself a pity party on Channel 5’s Cast Away[/caption]

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Phil’s first job since being axed from This Morning will see him stranded on an island off Madagascar for ten days, and in the trailer he asks: “I know what I did was unwise, but was it enough to absolutely destroy someone?”

No, of course it wasn’t. Everybody deserves a second chance.

And I might have applauded his comeback if it was a presenting job, not a reality programme where he is obviously throwing himself a pity party.

He turned down offers for other shows on BBC and ITV so he could take centre stage in this one-man show. Plugging it, Phil says: “It’s my chance to tell my side of my story.”

But last year, after admitting to having a morally dubious affair with a 20-year-old runner on This Morning, he did have his chance to tell his side of the story.

He spoke to The Sun and the BBC about how his life had been ripped apart and he   felt suicidal.

He said the affair had been unwise but not illegal”, yet felt “regret and remorse and guilt”.

Phil said all the young runner wanted was “a quiet life”, and added: “He didn’t want any of this to happen in the first place.”

Phil also said that he “must have been gay” when he married his poor wife Stephanie, who was “absolutely shattered” by his affair.

That is why Phil agreeing to do a show where he is the one getting therapy courtesy of Channel 5 really is so utterly cruel and distasteful.

Any wounds that may have started to heal will be ripped wide apart again now because of his latest actions.

Sitting dishevelled on a tropical beach, he goes on: “I’ve been cast away on a desert island, completely on my own. All I have is camera gear, and I can say whatever I want about whatever I want.”

Yes, he can. If he’d been on I’m A Celeb, he may have been asked awkward questions. So he’s chosen this carefully controlled Phillip Schofield show instead.

He didn’t need to work for charity to prove he’s sorry, but to do something that is so obviously all about him — and what happened to HIM — is so self-serving.

Talking about his new show, Phil added: “It appealed to me on so many levels.

“I’ve recently had a lot of time to think about my life, what went right and what went wrong, but I’ve always had the safe arms of friends and family wrapped around me.”

What went wrong is that you had a secret affair with a much younger man then lied and lied about it to all those close to you.

And one arm that wasn’t there to greet him was his former co-star Holly Willoughby who admitted she, too, was hurt by his lies.

This show will be a ratings hit, giving Phil the attention he craves.

But choosing to make it will also show there’s one person Phil rates above everyone else — himself.

Maggie’s Violet was a blooming marvel

Alamy

Dame Maggie Smith was utterly brilliant as Violet Crawley in TV series Downton Abbey[/caption]

DAME Maggie Smith really was one of the greats.

She was utterly brilliant as Violet Crawley in TV series Downton Abbey and brightened up many of our family Christmases as the sharp-tongued dowager.

Tributes have described her as a “wise, witty, waspish, wonderful” star.

What a woman. I hope she rests in peace.

Put the lid on dip’s dangers

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Bacteria are more likely to grow in hummus kept refrigerated without airtight lids[/caption]

THANKS to supermarket bosses at Tesco and Sainsbury’s we could, according to scientists, all be in grave danger.

Well, if you’re daft.

Microbiologists have warned that bacteria are more likely to grow in hummus kept refrigerated without airtight lids, after the two super-market chains got rid of them and instead put on peel-off ones similar to those on yoghurt pots.

Primrose Freestone, Professor of Clinical Microbiology at the University of Leicester, warned that storing hummus without airtight lids could lead to food poisoning.

So how about we all just dig out that Tupperware which everyone just shoves in kitchen cupboards, and actually use it?

Simple. Panic over.

Perils of jab fixes

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Mum-of-five Alice Webb tragically lost her life after having a Brazilian butt lift[/caption]

ALICE WEBB lost her life after having a Brazilian butt lift.

As tragic and awful as it is, I am not surprised that someone has died from having such a procedure because the cosmetic surgery world is like a Wild West of undertrained “experts” who are injecting God knows what into people’s bodies.

Non-surgical “liquid” BBLs are not illegal here. Because of a lack of cosmetic surgery regulation, there are minimal requirements for people who perform them and other aesthetic treatments.

I have had a fair bit of Botox shoved in my forehead over the years and every doctor and nurse who has ever administered it has discussed how dreadful it is that people with the most basic of qualifications can do procedures that can have terrifying consequences.

I really hope Alice’s death, at just 33, means this business is finally regulated so only medically qualified practitioners can administer such treatments.

Maybe “Alice’s Law”, in years to come, could bring a tiny bit of comfort to her five young children too.

Harry no mug for ad

3 Bears

Horrified fans have suggested Harry Kane sticks to football instead of acting[/caption]

HARRY KANE has been given a red card by fans for his acting skills after appearing in a porridge advert.

The plug for German-British brand 3Bears sees the Bayern Munich striker arriving at the company’s offices for his “first day at work” then being introduced to awestruck colleagues before sitting at a desk and pulling out a football-shaped mug.

Horrified fans have suggested he sticks to football instead of acting. But as dreadful as it is, it may just encourage kids to eat porridge this winter instead of sugar-laden cereals.

I had a staple breakfast of Shredded Wheat as a kid, thanks to Kevin Keegan. And yes, I am that old.

Did somebody say Just Eat?

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Just Eat has announced it has signed a deal to deliver sex toys[/caption]

EARLIER this year, Ann Summers teamed up with Deliveroo to bring instant satisfaction to their customers on Valentine’s Day – and now Just Eat has announced it has signed a deal to deliver sex toys.

Brings a whole new meaning to: “I’ll have some extra sauce, please.”

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AVOCADO on toast was for a while the food of choice for hipster millennials in trendy cafes – and now they’ve fallen in love with bathrooms of the same colour.

So sales have risen and they are bang on trend again – 50 years after they were first trendy.

But when you think about it, everything makes a comeback eventually, doesn’t it? Flares, aviator glasses, shoulder pads and jumpsuits.

The list goes on.

And actually, a warming, calming, green-coloured bath is probably better for a relaxing soak than a clinical white one.

Bring on the avocado.